This is the least-fun-speed-run version. Enough to solve the game but I recommend to play the game rather than just finishing it. But when there is no solution at the moment maybe these hints can help. The number in brackets are the dialogue options though those seem to have little influence on the game.

Guybrush’s Ship
Take the Voodoo Recipe from the mast.
Get the Monkey Coffin from the rear end and examine it in the inventory.
Combine Breath Mints and Root Beer.
Combine Cutlass and Fizzy Root Beer.
Talk to Elaine (1).

Elaine’s Ship
UseCutlass with Chuck the Plant.
Use Breath Mints with Barrel (o’ Grog).
Use Chuck Roots with Barrel of Fizzy Lite Grog.
Use Cutlass with Barrel of Enchanted Root Grog.
Use Enchanted Cutlass with LeChuck.

Flotsam Island
Talk to Davey Nipperkin (automatically) (1/1/1/1).
Go to the jungle, straight left.
Talk to Portly Pirate (4/2/2/2/2/3/5).
Take an action figure from the Pile of Pink Pajama Pierres.
Examine D’Oro’s Map. Head back to the Docks.
Use Action Figure with Vat next to the ‘Keelhauler Gazette’.
Go to the end of the docks, find the ‘Screaming Narwhal’.
Talk with Van Winslow (1/1/3).
Lock at Socks and find the Membership Card.
Talk to Crimpdigit, the pirate glassblower (3/3/3).
Go to the Club 41 Door (FIRST NEWS).
Take Broken Grogatini Glass and use Grogatini Sword with Ink-Stained Action Figure.
In the jungle, find the well (left, up).
Use D’Oro’s Map with Wishing Well.
Now follow the map (sounds of depicted animals tell you the way): Boar (right) and take Pile of Bombs, Ape (right), Bee (up), Ape (down), Boar (down), Bee (up), and Bird (left). Use Ninja Action Figurine with X marks the Spot. Find and talk to Joaquin D’Oro (1) (SECOND NEWS).
Back at the dock, use the Plank and then the Anchor Chain of the Screaming Narwhal.
Use Mini-Bomb with Grease Fire.
Use Lit Mini-Bomb with Frilly Pink Underwear, then use the Clothesline (THIRD NEWS).
Go to the Jungle Entrance and find the Creepy Shack (left, up, up, up according to map).
Walk to Door and say the password (1).
Talk to the Voodoo Lady (3/3/8).
Look at Skeleton Parrot and pick it up.
Pick up Interesting Bottle and go outside, there take the Weather Vane.
Back at the Dock, talk to the glassblower (2).
Use the Anchor Chain to board the ‘Screaming Narwhal’, talk to Van Winslow (1), use the Cannon and take the Cheese Wheel.
Exit the ship and get the glassblowers Unbreakable Bottle Breaker.
At the Courthouse talk to Crusty Pirate (1/1/1).
Go to the Doctor’s House’ Door twice and talk to De Singe (3/2/1).
The tricky part: right (press D once), up (press W), get the Key, middle (A), Cage, left (A), , down (S), Pedal (back), Pedal (front), middle (A) (face side), Picture of Guybrush’s Hand, left (D), up (W), Pictures, Bell, down (S), Banana Pedal, Shock Pedal, up (W), Bell, down (S), Banana Pedal.
Combine Unbreakable Bottle with Unbreakable Bottle Breaker.
Use Ancient Sc(r)oll with Eye of the Manatee.
Go to the Jungle Entrance and find the Altar (up) and use it with Hemlock’s Map: Bee (down), Ape (left), use Weather Vane (up), examine Flower Pot and use Nose-Shaped Flower Pot with Wishing Well, Weather Vane (right), Bee (left), Weather Vane (left), go round the Calendar, Weather Vane (up). Use Unbreakable Bottle Breaker with Crystal Nose, Pyrite Parrot with Nasal Cavity and take the Weird Door Face. Head back to De Singe’s House and confront him (5).
Use Ancient Tool with Clamshell.
Use the Weather Vane with the Interesting Socket on the idol to correctly put it together and use the Ancient Tool with the Clamshell.
Go to the Courthouse and use Cheese with Jail Carvings.
Go to the Strange Idol.
Use the Weather Vane with the Interesting Socket again and the Imprinted Cheese Wheel with the Strange Idol.
Once put together use the Ancient Tool with the Clamshell.
Same thing for the Enigmatic Idol, just use the Nose-Shaped Flower Pot with the Idol.
Meet De Singe at the Missed Up Idol, fool him (3) and use the U Tube with his rifle.
Examine the Weather Vane (right symbol) to be sure, otherwise rotate the idol slices to where De Singe likes it…
Again, use the Ancient Tool with Clamshell.

The Screaming Narwhal
Talk to Van Winslow (1).
Use Wheel, run to and fire the Cannon, point at the Map and talk to Van Winslow again.

To be continued? Aww, darn. A hard month lying ahead me mateys t’ wait for the masterpiece from LucasArts & TellTale Games. Yo ho!